Manifesting Gratitude with Healthy Entitlement

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I love autumn! The colours, cozy sweaters, the harvest and the continuous need for gratitude. Oprah has a bucket list of affirmations to help you grow and nurture gratitude in your life. And let’s face it, we’ve all been repeating these affirmations for months now and we don’t feel any different. By now we’re all wondering what we are missing?

The manifestation of gratitude stems from a balanced, healthy sense of entitlement. Healthy entitlement, by definition, is the glue that allows us to recognize our human rights, personal needs, wants and even desires. The imbalance stems from not clearly understanding what it is that we are actually entitled to. Mutual respect. Honesty. Support. These are the basics and where the magic occurs.

Consider the following scenario:
A mother of two school aged kids arrives home after working her full time job to find homework not complete, dinner not made (despite having prepped it the night before), her partner sitting on the couch checking out his favourite watch collecting website. Oh and boxes of half eaten crackers from the kids being hungry and not having dinner to eat.
The mother feels at her wit’s end. She wants to blow a gasket. Instead, she gets to work preparing dinner while seething with resentment. This resentment builds up over time until one day she has a nervous breakdown.

What the mother in this scenario doesn’t understand is that she is actually entitled to help and support. But she believes that she cannot ask for help. This missed connection stems from her internal references of entitlement. It is likely that her own mother felt as frazzled as she does and yet never asked for help. The power in this situation is speaking up, breaking down that unhealthy foundation that makes us think that we have to suffer through life. Suffer may seem like a harsh word but for many it is reality.

Considering the importance being placed of mental well being, it seems necessary to check in with our sense of entitlement, perhaps even tear down and rebuild. So, how do we check in? How do we find balance? How do we cultivate healthy entitlement so that we can welcome healthy, balanced gratitude into our lives? Here are some tips:

Develop Self Awareness. Explore what you connect with. What do you feel and do?

Identify your Inner Expectations about the World. These include those deep seeded beliefs and ideas. This is where many unhealthy perceptions linger.

Practice forgiveness often. Allow others to be who they are naturally even if they do not fit into your ideals or expectations of who you think they should be.

Grow Compassion and Empathy. Ask yourself, how does my action affect others? How does he or she feel right now? How would I feel if I were in that persons’ shoes?

Self Love. Nurture and connect with your inner child. Find joy. Explore your feelings – even the bad ones because you’ll know when something doesn’t feel right. Do that thing you’ve been putting off for so long.

The universe wants balance and wholeness. It seeks to correct imbalances; connect the whole. People benefit from being given to. We also benefit from giving back. That is where you’ll find your gratitude, your healthy entitlement.

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© 2014 Odessa Gill

© 2014 Odessa Gill | Natural Fertility Clinic Toronto West
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