Fertile Mind. Fertile Body

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We celebrate fertility this month. Our journeys are each unique. Some are all consuming, filled with struggles. Others may appear easier yet still overwhelming in a different way. For those of us called to motherhood, we feel this energy with the waxing and waning of the moon.

The alchemy of conception has always been a fascinating topic for me. A passion point – pardon the pun. Anita Diamants’ – The Red Tent sits comfortably on my bedside table once again – post it notes and arrows highlighting the ancient secrets of conception, pregnancy and childbirth exchanged among women in the sacred walls of the Red Tent. In the fast paced world we live in, this wisdom has been lost. But I have faith. I can feel the vibrations changing.

My research into this “seemingly magical process of transformation, creation or combination” has led me to believe that a critical piece is missing. Stillness. It is in silence, the stillness, the ability to listen to your heart, listen to the message of love that the magic happens. The fertility journey is one of self discovery, sprinkled with self love. I’ve written about self love before. Self love is our response to the chaos that occurs externally. It is also the response to the struggles of our hearts and minds.

pexels-photo-199604Conception is not simply the physical activity. It is both a mind activity; the concept or idea that is combined with the physical implantation. So this leads us to ask the questions – How can we use the mind to influence the body? How do we reconnect the two parts of self that may have become so disconnected and muddled on this fertility journey?

Let’s review… Stillness. Self-love. Mind-body connection.

All physical signs may point to a fertile womb but unresolved past trauma can restrict or impede our ability to allow for conception. As women, we hold our emotions in our hips. Addressing underlying issues through counselling and therapy can help. It can also be as simple as building skills that cultivate stillness. By focusing on what you can control, use coping tools with the things you cannot, you build self-empowerment.

Here are a few simple tools to cultivate the stillness, self-love and mind-body connection in which the alchemy of conception happens:

1. Intentional Actions. Honesty is always the best policy. Society has taught us to fear authentically acknowledging our deepest desires. We’re taught to put on a happy face when our best friend, who isn’t even trying to become pregnant, pees on the stick and two lines appear. Deep down we are crumbing into a million pieces. It is ok to put on a happy face for your friend but once you’re in your safe place and/or with your partner, hold space for your feelings. Fall apart. It is okay to recognize and honour your very authentic and raw emotions. Where it gets tricky is not allowing those emotions to take hold. Intentionally recognizing the negative emotions, thanking them for being part of this journey and then letting them go knowing that to hold onto them will not do your mind or body any good.

2. Giving Authentic Attention. Once again, social norms tell us that we should live our lives according to what others expect of us. We do this out of fear of judgement. As a good friend has told me too many times for me to count… “We cannot pour from an empty cup.” When we do not put ourselves first, we are no longer in control. In pleasing others, we loose sight of where we are in the great plan. When we consciously take time for ourselves whether it is preparing a favourite meal, reading a favourite book and drinking a cup of tea for the afternoon, or practicing yoga each day, we align with our authentic self. When there is congruency with our inner self there is a oneness of unity of the being; the mind and body are connected.

3. Engagement. Engagement begins with attitude. This isn’t the over the top attitude or feel sorry for me attitude. It is the attitude of possibility. The possibility and openness to seeing ourselves as a work in progress; organically and ethereally being open to learning and growth. The second key to attitude is adopting a mindset. Our awareness can bring to light people or things that no longer serve us. The engagement allows us to let it go. The third and final key is your investment in the process of engagement. Change can often be a slower and sometimes uncomfortable process. It takes practice to encourage your inner child to expand in the attitude of possibility. There will be highs and lows but have faith in your ability and invest in the process.

4. Being Open. Nothing is ever random. A very bold statement – absolutely. But allow me to put this into a palatable context. The universe gives us gifts – people, places, things. Some call these gifts blessings but which ever way you spin it, these gifts are meant for you. To stimulate you for a great purpose. When we pay more attention to the gifts the universe is gifting to us, when we pay more attention to our intuition, this increased awareness can lead to a paradigm shift. Within that shift, a new world can open up, new discoveries, new connections, possibilities… all leading us further along on our journey.

5. Savouring the Moment. Stop and smell the roses. Life is hectic. We are pushed and pulled in so many different directions. By giving ourselves permission to pause…breathe…and perhaps feel the sunshine on our face, or smell the blossoms or close your eyes and listen to the birds. It is in the stillness that we can feel our hearts desire – connect with it, hold it in the palm of your hands, surrender to it…honour it.

As a final thought, remember there is strength to be found in the vulnerability of our stillness. Welcome it with gentleness and patience.

With gratitude,

Lindsey

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© 2014 Odessa Gill

© 2014 Odessa Gill | Natural Fertility Clinic Toronto West
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